The year 1976 there was no treatment for cancer and my step dad had been ill for a long time now unable to eat or drink just spots of water, but he would not give in, i noticed as he got weaker body wise his spirit and fight got stronger and he was well aware of all that went on to the end. I suffered watching him suffer and i prayed hard that he would suffer no more.
I had seen him beg of god not to let him suffer any more and when asked if he was in pain, he said no, not anymore, but doctors did not believe it.
I had stopped going to Church seemed no point but some thing seemed to take me like a strong impulse, i stood in Church as they sang hymns looking around asking myself what i was doing there, i felt ashamed and worthless that i had come it was no place for me, i thought, when a voice like nothing i ever heard before spoke, it was like thunder not any thing man could have made it reduced me to nothing i felt like the blood was draining from me, it told me, I was brave and strong, and then all my fears and doubts were gone and i was lifted up and excited to tell every one my experience but i didnt because i knew what i would get from those i knew would never understand or believe me and say i was some kind of nutcase
It was a long time before i told any one and i got the answers i had expected and they came from Christians themselves because they had not found god in any real way themselves and i had, some were jealous and very unkind but i wasnt surprised. Many go to Church but have never read the bible, never pray except perhaps in Church and treat Church like a club where they meet with there local friends and after Sunday its all forgottten . Much of the bible is just a book with stories in and many are full of doubts and when any one wants to tell them any real experience of god they may have had they scorn them.
I have heard people say about many things , “Why bother”, we bother to do things because we were given a life to live. Some of us want to make this world a better place any way that is within our power. Life is not easy for any one and some people who are not worthy of a life seem to want to make things difficult for others. For example this morning i read of a police officer that was helping a man over the loss of his son who had died in a car crash this woman robbed the old man of a hundred thousand pounds, what a mean greedy selfish minded vile woman taking advantage of a grieving old man.
When my step father was dyeing with cancer i wanted to bring in a priest in his final hours but my step mothers sister said if i did she would leave. Why was she so scared of the sight of some one claiming to be a follower of god but she really did seem scared, the mention of god, priests, or Church made her turn quite nasty and she appeared to battle some thing inside of herself. There can only be one reason for this and that is the fear of facing herself but god already knows what we are, and if we lie to him he knows that too. People are aware of the changes they must make to be accepted by god so they avoid him like the plaque.
Whoever does not receive the kingdom of god like a child will never enter it. LUKE: CHAPTER 18. VERSE 17. NEW TESTEMENT .
I have struggled for days with a really rotten cold but i feel worse wrapping myself up and feeling sorry for myself so i keep busy inbetween sneezing my head of, but i am not spreading this germ i am staying in but it as left me drained of energy.
The Respect Award i received from Vibrant who as been an inspiration to all of us and always there to help. The painting is by Robert Goldstein and i think its great and i say thank you so much for this.
I took this from Sarasatticoftreasures a beautiful blog and i thought how true this is. I suppose i am obedient now in the way that i tell people more about my faith in god than i ever did before, at one point i treated it like a secret i could not share because i felt nobody would ever understand or believe me, even though i knew god wished me to tell others i knew many would scoff as they did, and many would turn on me which they did, now is the right time perhaps.
Simon Cowell is addicted to botox but is it really making him look better? Hate to say i don’t like the beard very much and his face looks so much fatter, perhaps that is the botox if so maybe he would look better with a few wrinkles, that is what i think.
This is such a shocking sight to see and should never be happening, these people are suffering many elderly died on the way or got left behind never to see there family again, and children are having anything but a normol life, as winter gets closer many will die, are we doing enough, is there more we could do?.